CzabeCast Thursday June 14, 2018

US Open begins. Bigger story: Phil completes career slam, Tiger wins to re-ignite comeback? Terry Collins audio with umpire. Opening bid: “You c***sucker!” Redskins season ticket list is dead. Is Harper already one foot gone from Nats? SPECIAL GUEST: Thom Loverro, Washington Times Columnist.

CzabeCast Wednesday June 13, 2018

Alex Ovetchkin closes the Championship parade in style: “I told you we were not going to fucking be suck this year!” Social media continues to make people complete monsters. Mike Franscesa invents Draft Kings, about 5 years too late. FTG and bees understand “zero.” SPECIAL GUEST: Drew Olson, Big 920 Milwaukee, WI.

Daily Czabe: The 30-Fore-30 Treatment of Club Pro Guy’s 8-Par Streak

A little backstory is necessary on this one. About a year ago, somebody on Twitter created an account called “Club Pro Guy.” That person, almost certainly, is/was a PGA of America club professional. Not necessarily a glamour job, despite the perception from casual golfers or non golfers. Club pros, are the grinders of the golf industry, working at least 6 days a week in season, and doing a lot of tedious things like folding sweaters in the pro-shop and giving lessons to 70 year olds who can’t break 100.

But the Twitter account “Club Pro Guy” had a twist. They created a “backstory” on him. That he once played the “Mexican Mini-Tour” (doesn’t exist) and that he had very modest success. He once made “8 straight pars.” The “feat” is talked about, as if it was Tiger’s “Tiger Slam” of four majors in a row. If you play golf, you will find this guy very funny. And you need to dig back into his timeline on twitter to get some of the running jokes. The menu bar at the top of his website is a good place to start.

Golfer Beef Johnson Has A Delicious Towel

Anonymous Baseball Exec on Bryce Harper: “Selfish Losing Player”

Rafa Nadal Says Pay Tennis Purses Based on TV Viewership

Let’s Carve Up California Like A Chicken!

Argentina Prisoners To Go On Hunger Strike if They Can’t Watch World Cup

Andrew Luck Throws Little Baby Football For First Time In Months

Ottowa Senators Star Player Cyber-Bullied By Girlfriend of Teammate

Greg Hardy Knocks the F*** Out of His MMA Opponent

The Case for Jim Rome in the Radio Hall of Fame

 

 

 

 

Daily Czabe: Adorable 8 Year Old Girl Slays Zepplin Riff on Drumset

The interwebs are full of hateful, stupid, time wasting things. This, is not one of them. Being able to sit down to a drum kit and play something, anything, not resembling the noise of a guy falling down a tall flight of stairs is a cool thing. I’ve been told, I can do that. But to see a smiling 8 year old girl just dissect one of the most iconic drum beats in rock-n-roll history with precision, is absolute gold.

8 Year Old Girl Kills It on “Good Times, Bad Times” By Led Zepplin

The Debate Is Over. Yes, Washington IS A Great Sports Town

Jon Gruden’s “QB Camp” With Now Retired Brett Favre is… Well… Awesome!

The Burden of Being LeBron Jame

LeBron’s to Direct Film Critical of NCAA

Messi and Ronaldo Still The Stars Of The World Cup, Despite Never Winning It

Seattle Abruptly Figures Out Random $275 “Head Tax” Is Probably A Bad Idea

 

 

CzabeCast Tuesday June 12, 2018

Winning a championship is sweet, but it wouldn’t be complete unless you shared the experience with a good sports friend. Andy Pollin has been that guy to me for almost 20 years now, and while I hate that we didn’t get to share a studio together for this post-Cup celebration, I still loved doing so on his back porch. SPECIAL GUEST: Andy Pollin, “Andy Pollin’s DC Podcast.”

CzabeCast Monday June 11, 2018

Czabe returns from Vegas, voice mostly intact and with the warm glow of a Stanley Cup Championship still on his smile. LeBron’s big reveal: “Oh. My hand! It’s (practically) broken!” Separating the three parts of LeBron James. The awesome, the good, and the laughable. Terrell Owens decides to snub the HOF induction ceremony. Good!

Daily Czabe: Lavar Ball’s Half-Ass Amateur Basketball League Is Going About As Well As You Would Expect

Last summer, was the Summer of Lavar Ball. Bored in the doldrums, most of the media lapped up this screw-loose blowhard in the lead-up and the aftermath of the NBA Draft. This summer, with a potential 2nd child going pro (don’t hold your breath) the budding basketball entrepreneur is getting his JBA league off the ground. And well, it’s getting off the ground about as well as a dead body. Now is when ol’ Lavar Ball NEEDS the free airtime. Yet, it seems most everybody realizes he’s a carnival barker whose own carnival left him on the side of the road two towns ago.

Lavar Ball’s Startup Basketball League Not Exactly Selling Like Hotcakes

“Dog One is Now Open! Repeat… Dog One Is Now Open!” Delaware Opens Legal Sports Betting

Keith Olbermann Takes Aim at NBC Hockey Coverage With Dale Jr. Appearance, Stupid Twitter Fight Breaks Out

Vegas City Officials Busted Pre-Planning Parade Route Options

Yes! Jerry Reed Also Did A “Westbound and Down!”

Teen Girl Learning to Drive, Kills Two Men In… PARKING LOT!

Drunk Driver Takes Nap…. In Middle of Road!

Pastor Killed By Croc During River Baptism: That’ll Teach Ya!

Golfer Beaten With Clubs After Asking to Play Through

Fellow Designer Kenneth Cole Feels the Twitter Mob’s Wrath

 

 

 

CzabeCast Wednesday June 6, 2018

I’m guessing a certain number of you people just don’t like hockey. Fine. Harumph. I am headed to Vegas, perhaps to see Lord Stanley. Donald Trump and his abrupt un-invitation to the Eagles. You can’t win arguing this issue on the radio. Apps to help limit your iPhone usage. Drones. The Boy/Not-Boy Scouts. SPECIAL GUESTS: Bob and Brian, 102.9 The Hog FM. Milwaukee, WI.

Daily Czabe: Spending Too Much Time On Your Phone? There’s Now An App For That!

We live in strange times. What if I had told you back in the flip phone era, that someday these things we once just used for the sole purpose of calling people, would become such addictive miniature touch-computers, that they would have to design them in a way that ends up preventing you from over-using it? Nuts, right? But here we are, as Apple has promised to roll out a new app called “Screen Time” in September that will help users monitor and limit usage. But before you sing “hallelujah” just yet, consider this. There is already a 3rd part app called “Moments” which does basically the same thing. And…. their data showed that users only shaved about 2 minutes off their phone/tablet usage a day! Bah! Well, I guess it’s a start, right?

Apple: Using Our Phones Too Damn Much? Well, We’re Creating An App For That!

High School Athletes Suspended… For Smoking Graduation Cigars??

Texas’ $60M High School Football Stadiums Full of Shitty Concrete!

The WWE Is A Cash Printing Machine

Solo Crashing: “This Is Not How The Force Works”

Of Course That Little Weasel Mark Zuckerberg Lied to Congress

Dumb Ways to Die: Shark Ate My Penis, Now I’m Dead

Miss America Pageant Scrapping Swimsuit Competition, Evening Gowns

Feminist Comics: “I’d Rather Be Called A C*** Than Ma’am”

Report: Fewer Than 10 Eagle Players Were Going to White House Anyway

Too Much News Can Make You Sick… Literally, Sick

 

 

 

 

CzabeCast Tuesday June 5, 2018

J.R. Smith’s blunder is mined for hilarious internet videos and memes. Steph Curry is “Shoot-a-tron 3000”. The scrubs come out at night, and who are these Cavs stiffs? NBA officiating snafus and dilemmas. Upstate Loser Update. Gouging your eyes out, and loving it! SPECIAL GUEST: Tim Murray, SB Nation AM.

Daily Czabe: Bare Knuckle Fighting Is Back!

Just what civilized society didn’t ask for: a new blood sport, with guaranteed blood and a damage! Now let’s bring back limitless rounds, and “fight to the death” matches while we’re at it! Heck, maybe we can have Bear Baiting and Dwarf Tossing as warm-up acts?

Professional Bare Knuckle Boxing Returns After 120 Years

Who Threw That Crab!?

Capitals Pre-Game Hype Video: “Our City, Our Team, Our Time”

Michael Jenkins New Hit: “It’s Okay To Believe, When You’re Reppin’ DC”

The NFL’s New Helmet to Helmet Rules: Further Explained

Johnny Knoxville Is Back, Still Doing His Own Insane Stunts

Russian Soccer Hooligans Head to the Woods

 

CzabeCast Monday June 4, 2018

The Caps get a leg up on the Golden Knights. Czabe schnorrs more free shit. Explaining hockey to a noob. Inspiring and insipid pre-game features. Writing silly songs about sports. Waze has some homeowners in a daze. SPECIAL GUEST: Michael Jenkins, NBC Sports Washington. 

CzabeCast June 1, 2018

J.R. Smith pulls an all-time blunder in NBA Finals Game 1. Sears is clinging to life, as an American retail icon. Casting the NBA Finals with actors. LeBron James channels his inner Richie Rich. Pusha-T v. Drake fued explained. SPECIAL GUEST: Notorious J-A-Y. Jay Cottrell.

CzabeCast Thursday May 31, 2018

Braden Holtby and the save that rocked DC! Other comparable DC sports “moments” like that. A sea of red downtown at the watch party. Doc Emrick is a master. Hot takes run amok. NBA Finals begin. Kim K meets The Donald. SPECIAL GUEST: Andy Pollin, Andy Pollin’s DC Podcasts.

CzabeCast Wednesday May 30, 2018

Capitals face a “can’t lose” Game 2 in Vegas. Wilson avoids suspension. The anthem issue, in honest financial terms. Roseanne blows her head off with Twitter. NFL silly season. Frontier Airlines, never dull! And “anyone for penis!” SPECIAL GUEST: ALL CZABE!