In today’s episode, Czabe takes some tough love on the poor quality of his Monday episodes. Drew Olson takes credit for birthing the “Chucky Hacks” line in Brewer history. We bury Ty Montgomery one last time over his blunder. Of course he’s a Raven now. The Ha-Ha trade makes no sense. Plus Adrian Peterson is now in a league with Jim Thorpe.
He was larger than the game, and the highest paid athlete of his time. He also forged a sports celebrity culture that is a billion-dollar industry today. Author Jane Leavy’s book sheds further light on the Bambino and the world off the field he helped create. Andy Pollin rolls in for his usual Tuesday spot. Hue Jackson, finally soooo fired. Twitter to remove the “Like” button? Why?
As football fans, we’ve all seen some crazy s*** go down to both win and lose games. But I’m not sure I’ve seen anything as stupid as what Ty Montgomery did on Sunday. Bruh. What… what are you doing? So it’s time for accountability. Who will pay the price? My Redskins are dominant defensively, and Adrian Peterson is still awesome. How long can it last? Week 8 NFL in summary. World Series to Boston… duh. And let’s re-think having 18 inning 6-hour baseball games. Long live, Apu Nahasapemapetalon.
This week’s F5WF promises to be a molly-whomper of an episode! Buckle up for me and Mr. X to collaborate on our picks for Week 8. Paul Charchian dispenses essential fantasy advice, and a chilling recanting of his former Halloween ways. Timmy T-Time Murray has been white hot with his college football picks, so we are jumping on the train with him this week. Free money, ya’lls! And we also find out why Charlie Casserly says teams should always call a new coach/GM in the NFL everyday, when it seems like they are in over their head. If you don’t get it, then pry open your digital wallet for a mere $5 a month! Go to www.czabe.com/subscribe and join the “Football Five Ways” party!
In essence, you know one when you see one. Unless you argue about what makes a “true” #1. Notorious J-A-Y and I hash through that argument, and split over the merits of Tyreke Hill. Don’t wear these Halloween costumes. Ever. Chris Paul vs. Rajon Rondo. LeBron’s heavy load. Gas pump etiquette. Arianna Grande. Instagram models be thirsty, very thirsty.
There are different rules for quarterbacks in the NFL. Both on the field, and off. QB’s have to be like mini-CEOs, even when they aren’t the starter. So when a 3rd string palooka like Kelly screws up it’s probably curtains for his career. Why is Adam Silver so lenient on NBA suspensions? Drew and his radio partner KB join me to lay the Brewers to rest for 2018. NYPD hot-mom precinct boss takes sexual harassment to a new level. HOT!
You don’t have to be 75 years old to remember the last two times Jerry Jones and the Cowboys tried to purchase a wideout who could be an immediate impact. You just need to recall Joey Galloway and Roy Williams. Will Amari Cooper be another flop? Frank Caliendo’s best voice picks from last Friday’s Y.A.L.L. Andy Pollin on the Redskins win, and the CBS return to DC. Me and OBJ are “hangdai.”
Anybody who has ever loved a baseball team, only to see them come up just short… knows the feeling of Brewer fans. Everyone thinks their team is “special” but this one truly was. Unpacking the heartbreak of Game 7. I also go through Week 7 in the NFL and all of the kicking mayhem. Plus, a little twitter spat with a bourbon snob.
This week’s F5WF promises to be a slobber-knocker! Buckle up for me and Mr. X to collaborate on our picks for Week 7. Fanball.com’s Paul Charchian dispenses essential fantasy advice, and seething hatred for pumpkin spiced wings. Special guests Fox Sports’ Tim Brando on college football and looming “chaos” with the CFP Playoff committee, and NFL Network’s Mike Mayock on QB play in the NFL and how the college game is influencing it. If you don’t get it, then pry open your digital wallet for a mere $5 a month! Go to www.czabe.com/premium and join the “Football Five Ways” party!
So if you believe the recorded evidence from the fed’s NCAA corruption sting, Kansas tried to buy stud recruit Zion Williamson with “whatever it takes” and yet he still chose Duke. Hmmmm. Let’s go grab every computer in the hoops office and do a through colonoscopy once and for all. MLB’s hooded fashion disaster. Notorious J-A-Y on cornrows, Jessica Mendoza and more. Dislodging disgusting “Fatbergs.”
Drew Olson joins me to talk about the extraordinary double-thriller for Wisconsin fans on Monday night. Not just Jeremy Jeffress wiggling out of a bases loaded 9th inning jam, but Aaron Rodgers extending the dumb shit-eating luck of one Mike McCarthy – *Highly Successful Football Coach. The NBA season has begun, and there will be threes! Let’s calm down a bit on poor ol’ Tyreke Hill. And wait until you get drone toothpaste from a cloud!
So apparently, an illegal pick-play isn’t what you think it is. At least that’s what the latest NFL propaganda video “explainer” from Al Riveron would have you believe after many fans thought the Pittsburgh Steelers got away with a blatant penalty on the game winning Antonio Brown play. Who are you gonna believe? Your own eyes, or smilin’ Al? Andy Pollin joins me to find a glass certainly half full (and probably leaky) when it comes to the Redskins. Nonetheless, we’ll drink our 1st place milk while it’s in the glass! All of that, plus lawnmower, chainsaw, and Tennessee family redneck justice.
The hyped Chiefs v. Patriots game did not disappoint. Not for fantasy owners of Tyreke Hill, or anybody who had the “over.” I run through all of Week 6, including the Redskins bounce-back win over the Panthers. Plus I find some time for NLCS and ALCS talk and a quick look at how the “Big 4 Zeroes” in college football are forming for the playoff run.
Adrian Fucking Peterson. Remind me to never ever ever doubt him again. Going into this game, my weeklong lament was that I couldn’t believe that the “best we have” at RB was a 34 year old legend who is now nursing three separate injuries after just 4 games (shoulder, ankle, knee). Well, guess what? HE IS!! And he’s not just the best WE have… he’s still in the top-10 of rushers in the league from an “eye test” standpoint. Peterson has amazing lateral jump-cut ability at the point of attack, still combined with great vision and instinct on where a hole is going to open up. Rest assured, if this same o-line was blocking for Rob Kelly or Samaje Perine, we’d be pissing and moaning about how over-rated the o-line is. Peterson is routinely making them look good, by maximizing the gashes they create, and finding unintended ones when the play has been effectively stuffed. Before the season, I made a (perhaps foolish) “boast bet” about Peterson not lasting the season, or his production fizzle-ing out by Thanksgiving. I said I’d “eat a pumpkin” if he hit a certain milestone. Well, we’re still many weeks away, but put it this way: I’ve already googled a few recipes.
Josh Norman’s bounce back game. It’s amazing how psycho NFL speculating and punditry can be. For example, after my ex-colleague Kevin Sheehan broke the story on his podcast about Josh’s headphones being angrily removed by force by Jay Gruden at halftime of the Saints game – a story that was ultimately backed up by national reporters like Ian Rappaport and then in-game by Pam Oliver – there were stories being written about Norman being cut this year – CUT! – and speculation about a “messy and expensive divorce” after this year. Well, a great game in coverage and a pick (okay, fair catch, but still!) and a fantastic Peanut Punch forced fumble later, and never mind all of that stuff. The Redskins are NOT going to CUT Norman this year. And I would bet he’ll be here next season, albeit perhaps with a restructure. Jay told me when I sat down for his weekly interview at Redskins Park last Friday that he likes intense players like Norman and that “he’s going to help us win a lot of games in the future.” It was pure coachspeak, but it turned out to be very true. Credit Jay for making a mark on the kind of bullshit he won’t tolerate, then turning the page to help keep a good player fully invested.
Alex Smith as a $24 million quarterback. Smith’s offense has scored a single 2nd half touchdown this season. One. A garbage time TD plunge by Kapri Bibbs while trailing the Saints 43-13. In a league designed as a pinball machine with free-games at 20 million points, this is unconscionable. And sure, I’ll lay quite a bit of blame on the lack of dynamic outside WR’s. But let’s be honest, Smith was dogshit in New Orleans, and not very good vs. Carolina. He hit two wide open guys for TDs on coverage breakdowns, but otherwise was late, unsure, and inaccurate. He was 21-36 for only 163 yards while taking 3 sacks and almost losing a fumble after getting blown up by Julius Peppers. To squeeze just 163 yards out of 35+ trigger pulls is very low wattage. I read one beat writer who floated the “new system” excuse, but I reject that out of hand. Cousins has a new system in Minnesota, a swiss cheese O-line, and he’s 2nd in the league in passing yards. Smith was touted as no worse than a plug-and-play equivalent to Cousins. The giddy vibe in the summer from some voices inside the park were gleefully hinting that he’d be a big upgrade. Upgrade! If Smith doesn’t improve, then even a surprise playoff appearance from this team in January, will have a quick ending. Like his appearances usually do.
Carolina’s cowardice on 4th down and end of game play-calling. What ever happened to “Riverboat Ron?” The Panthers open the game moving the ball nicely. Face 4th and a football at their own 47. Punt. BAHAHAHAHA! You fucking gutless pussy, Rivera! Five running plays and a punt on 4th and less than 1 at mid-field! With an entire game to come! Seriously, bro, what are you afraid of? And with Cam Newton, who can run through, or jump over, just about anything 4th and 2 or shorter? Wow. Well, as I like to say in the NFL: “Cowardice gets punished.” Sure enough, a great punt is botched by rookie DJ Moore wandering around lost in the end zone. Then after a 3-and-out, Moore fumbles after trying to break his 6th tackle on a punt return while facing backward, at his own 22 yard line. Idiot. Next play: Redskins TD. The Panthers – a team that knows it’s not a comeback team – could have been up 10-0 but basically threw away two possessions right out of the gate, and were looking at 0-17 before they could blink. Then at the end of the game, Carolina did something rather amazing: they OVER-saved their timeouts! Don’t think I’ve ever seen that happen. Not only did they die with two in their pocket, but the play calling on 2nd and 5 from the 16 yard line was mindless. Norv Turner dialed up 3 straight “shot” plays (two into the endzone) that relied on touch and timing – neither one Cam’s strong suit. With two timeouts in your hand you can run anything and everything. Runs. Draws. RPO’s. Cam keepers. Get the first down first, then you have essentially 1st and goal, 30 seconds left, and yet another timeout to allow for full playbook diversity. These are the things that make me say you or I could be “average” play-callers in the NFL, if we were giving a full season of immersive training. Not great. But not this brain dead.
The Net Net
First place never felt so soft and smelled so nice! The Cowboys come to town next Sunday, riding high after crushing the Jags. Jay followed up a horrible job with a great focused short week. When we all looked at the schedule back in May, 3-2 was the “chalk line of expectations” and here we are. All in all, not bad.
Another jam-packed and rock-em-sock ’em week! I try to go to an absurd 6-0 on my “Lock-of-the-Week” play. Uncharted territory. Thin air. High pressure. Mr. X explains the “2.5 Point Trap” theory. Plus gives his best release of the weekend. Paul Charchian gives us the skinny on which bums to bench in fantasy. Ty Hildenbrandt of the Solid Verbal podcast talks college football and how Alabama has basically ruined the season for everybody. And a special “Green Room Confidential” with Mike Jones of USA Today and former Skins RB Clinton Portis. This is an hour and 20 minutes of pure football packed tighter than a women’s restroom at a Van Halen concert!
Come get it by subscribing at www.czabe.com/premium