“Come on and watch some baaaasssket..ball….”

It’s that time of year, once again! CzabeVegas 6: Bigger, Badder, Stupider.

Or something like that.

I can’t wait to see everyone who has enlisted this year in our twin “Watch Parties” at the Hard Rock’s Ainsworth Lounge. If you couldn’t make it, just start scheming to make 2016 a reality.

Above are the commemorative coins/ID badges for this year’s event. I couldn’t resist immortalizing that a-hole Nik Stauskas of Michigan who cost somebody $1000 by missing a free throw at the end of their game against Tennessee (which, BTW, was WELL in hand before a slow motion second half train wreck).

Who will make the 2016 coin? We shall see. Maybe one of our listeners who does something incredibly heroic/stupid. You never know.

Now, if you have ever wondered about the origins of my silly words for the CBS College Basketball Theme song, then watch this video below.

Note 1: Herb Alpert DID go to USC, but I sincerely doubt he was a basketball fan.

Note 2: ESPN anchor Bram Weinstein actually came up with the “Come on and watch some basketball” hook line for the song. He was hosting a show on our local radio station in Washington DC about 10 years ago, and I heard him riff this one night while I was driving home.

Bram is a talented guy, who pushed his way to a solid spot on the World Wide Leader. He has a silly goofy sense of humor, so I wanted him to have credit for the “hook” lest I get sued someday like Pharrell Williams.

Of course, Bram did not write any further lyrics, that was all my doing. Including the “Coach K is gay” line, which 10 years ago looked completely harmless. It was meant in the way we meant that term growing up. Not homosexual (and not that there’s anything wrong with that) but rather “gay” as in “a jerk.”

Someday, I get the feeling I will need to change that to “Coach K is GRAY” in reference to amazing ability to maintain jet black hair, well into his 60’s.

Finally, I leave you with a video of one of the early CzabeVegas-es, when it was a more intimate affair. And also with my buddy Cowboy Mike’s Sure-Fire-Never-Lose-Unless-It-Does way to play craps.

Viva Las Vegas! See ya’ll Monday!

Lessons from my glorious 12 year run at craps:  
By “Cowboy Mike”

1.  There is no such thing as a good strategy or bad strategy.  Like a lottery ticket, a dumb bet is dumb until it hits…then it’s smart.  That said, I suggest you pick a strategy for a session (or weekend) and stick with it.  For example, don’t flip from the Pass Line to the Don’t Pass — because you will almost certainly lose both ways and feel like the biggest loser in Vegas.

2.  Most important:  Find that guy or girl.  They are very rare and extremely difficult to locate, but some people are just plain lucky.  You will know them when you see them — something about how they act or talk or smile.  These people cannot lose.  I cross paths with one about every third or fourth trip.  The one lucky guy or girl will cover all your losing bets that week.  All of them.  Keep your eye out for these precious people.  It is the most important lesson here.  And when they tell you how to bet, don’t think — just do whatever they tell you.

3.  If you are fortunate enough to play alongside him, when Lucky Guy leaves the table, walk away.  You won’t want to leave, but you must.  Luck follows these rare people, and as soon as they leave your table will turn to ice. Guaranteed.  It’s hard to quit because winning is so much fun, and you’ll tell yourself that maybe it wasn’t Lucky Guy who brought all that good fortune — but you’ll be wrong.  Color up, and move on.  

4.  Proper Beer Level is just as important in craps as it is in golf.  Everyone has their own level, but find yours and maintain it for the session.  .

5.  Trying to use sheer will to turn a cold table warm does not work — except when it does.  I have had success by not giving up too soon, but it’s hard to know when to quit on a bad table.  But when you do cash out, walk away and keep walking.  Don’t hover just to see how the table gets — it’s bad luck and nothing good can happen (if the table heats up you’re pissed because you stopped playing, and if the table stays cold you feel glad seeing other people lose…which is not what Vegas is about).

6.  The second hottest chick at the table will do better than the hottest chick.  Seen it a million times.  Everybody wants the hot chick to throw a hot roll so they load up, but she will seven-out right away.  The next chick, however, will quietly hit a few points and put some money in your pocket.