The Sad, But Predictable Unintended Consequences of “No More…”

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Sorry to say, but I saw this kind of story coming from a mile away.

An NBA player and his girlfriend were brutally stabbed by a random assailant, after an fight broke out between the player and a guy who was “eavesdropping on their private conversation” outside a NYC nightclub.

And by “conversation” of course, witnesses mean it was a “lover’s quarrel.”

Now maybe there’s more to this story that will come out in the coming days, but the basic shape of it seems clear. A guy stuck his nose into somebody’s business, and it ended up very, very badly.

But wait! We were lectured by serious looking NFL players that the days of saying…. (and these are actual quotes)…

“What’s the big deal…”
“He just has a temper…”
“Not my problem…”
“I’ll say something next time…”
“I’m sure they’ll work it out…”

… were now banished with the directive of ACTION of these two simple words – “NO MORE!”

Even Cris Carter said with his big, sad, serious eyes… “No more bystanding.”

Well, maybe this knife wielding maniac was trying to break up a domestic violence assault, and he was acting in self defense? We know this… HE WASN’T MINDING HIS OWN BUSINESS during this argument, and that’s what precipitated the entire bloody horror show.

The argument that we must all enlist now as unpaid domestic violence beat cops (NO MORE!) always struck me as simplistic at best, and insulting at worst. It’s as if WE have been silent co-conspirators to domestic abuse for years. Shame on us!

In reality, it’s a messy, complicated, 50-Shades of gray area issue. I once knew a couple who would literally SCREAM at each other while hosting a party with company in their house, and it blew me away. But I don’t think they ever HIT each other.

Should I have “said something” back then?

Guys and their girls have been getting into verbal fights outside of nighclubs forever. What should we do now, Eli Manning? Call the cops, even if no punches are thrown?

It’s very politically incorrect to say this, but the issue of domestic violence is ultimately solvable by essentially one party: the victims. Until women can convince each other to simply not put up with a man laying a violent finger on them, there’s no amount of helpful “butting in” that will make an even meaningful dent in the problem.

But hey, it might just end up getting you SHOT someday, so there’s that to look forward to! But don’t worry. I’m sure the former NFL players in that video will show up to your funeral.

 

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Steve Czaban is a 25 year sports radio veteran, who hosts an afternoon drive show in Washington D.C. "Czabe" also writes and edits his own commentaries for www.czabe.com and other on-line and print publications. He can be reached at czabe@yahoo.com.

14 COMMENTS

  1. Well said, these “No More” spots are insulting to everyone that does not beat their spouse or girlfriend. I for one will not get involved with any couples argument. You might as well jump into a closed dumpster with a Bobcat.

  2. I said the same thing the very first time I saw those asinine commercials. You stick your nose into somebody else’s business and see what happens. One thing I have noticed it that 99% of the time battered women will turn on you and defend their abuser if you try to get involved. Just let it be because these women (or men) will keep choosing, again and again and again, to be with partners who are abusive.

  3. The victim of Greg Hardy went to the cops and was charged, and Czabe thought he was being railroaded by a gold digger. To which I asserted there is no gold to dig for if no abuse/crime has been committed, or it would happen 24/7 to rich guys all over the freaking place. Accuse a rich dude and get rich yourself. Rinse and repeat.

    The chick was paid by Hardy to shut up and the charges were ultimately dropped because the case fell apart without her testimony, etc. The NFL will sit that shitbag Hardy IMO even though he received his “due process”.

    So if the victims are the only ones who can solve this, don’t defend pieces of shit like Hardy. Got that Czabe? That lawyer for shitbags thing you do will never cease to amaze me. The hypocrisy of it all. Who the F do you think the stabber will call pray tell?

    PS: The No More campaign is stupid I concur. But a knife wielding freak is hardly a direct consequence of it. A mentally stable person would call 911 if it looked very serious (I have seen some that were), not get to stabbin’. Jesus.

  4. Jordan – you have absolutely no evidence that Greg Hardy paid-off his ex-girlfriend in exchange for her silence. However, there is evidence that the case was dropped because her testimony had major holes in it and would have fallen apart under cross-examination.

    And your self-rightious ignorance can also go. Tons on accusations get settled out-of-court because rich people (especially famous rich people) do get sued/threatened with charges fairly frequently on bogus or exaggerated charges. Rich people are often rich for a reason, and because there is a substantial opportunity-cost involved in going to a trial (that, regardless of the veracity of the charges, may or may not go in one’s favor) they will often just pay up.

    Finally, I don’t think that there is any realistic solution to the problem. Many victims of abuse (and remember, even NOW acknowledges that women initiate the violence in the majority of domestic disputes) will “stand by their man/woman.” Or, if they do go to the police and the abuser does go to jail, the woman just finds a new abuser to become involved with. Find out for yourself – go talk to women who have been abused and you end up finding out that they have been with like 7 different guys who have hit them. Perhaps the only solution is to forcibly sterilize all serial abusers and all serial abuse victims so that in 500 years or so those genes will (possibly) have been eliminated. But I’m fairly sure the Supreme Court would rule such an action as un-Constitutional.

  5. josh don’t even bother to try to reason with Jordana.
    I went thru this ringer two months ago with this clown on the whole Hardy thing.
    It’s just that time of the month for her.
    Don’t waste your time or breath on her.
    Her and Nancy Grace should have lunch together.

  6. Josh and dick tock: No offense but you’re both naive morons. And dicky, you admitted yourself Hardy paid her to STFU back when you were talking out of your ass in support of unmitigated asswipe athletes (like Hardy, as Czaban is strangely want to do while he pimps for criminal defense attorneys. Who needs criminal defense attorneys? Wait, I think you’ve got it dicky, CRIMINALS!!). But I digress.

    A well known Dallas sportscaster (Dale whatever) gave a long rant on why he was disgusted his Cowboys signed a guy who beats women. Where’s his evidence there Josh and why no defamation lawsuit from Hardy pray tell? If the NFL sits his ass (they will) he should have an open and shut wrongful suspension lawsuit. He won’t.

    My sister has been abused so spare me the lecture. These vermin need to face severe consequences. There are countless rich people who are never accused of wrongdoing, ever. Again, why not?. Get some free cash by accusing a rich dude Josh. Their opportunity cost of going to court is just too high.

    Good god. Dipshits.

  7. Jordan – you sound pretty abusive yourself. Are you sure it wasn’t you who abused you sister? You seem to almost no control over your emotions and a complete inability to distinguish between emotions and facts. Nor can you distinguish between febrile name-calling and rational discussion. I repeat – you are an abuser, that is why you know so much about it.

  8. Sticks and stones dick tock. And oh, the humanity there Josh. I love how the guys who defend an uncivilized douchebag woman beater can’t handle being called morons. Oh, and dipshits. Sorry. That is rich. On a blog were expletives are thrown around regularly.

    This once decent blog might be readable again if the writer hadn’t become a raging hypocrite sellout (I guess at some point when you make a shitload of money for not doing much, whoring yourself becomes easier by the millisecond) and the commenters weren’t such sensitive pussies.

    Dick tock, take your IQ and multiply it by 5. Your halfway to mine. Work on the grammar and sentence structure. You’d prolly have more $ and respect just from heeding that one tip alone you idiot..

    God this is fun. I should be paid to make this no-one-reads-it-blog interesting. 🙂

  9. jordana,
    u are dumber than your sister…

    I make 6 figures a year more than you in 5 years im sure.
    you think I care what my grammar looks like??
    u don’t like this blog,,,why you follow it multiple time a day than dip shit??
    you’re like the child in class that can’t stop staring at the cute girl but swears up and down you don’t like her.
    now go back down stairs and make your bed before your mother grounds you.

  10. Dick Tock,

    Crack dealers do make a good living. Nice work. At least you have that going for you. Btw, the fact that you and Czaban are in agreement about that shitbag Hardy speaks volumes.

    Get a real job you dumbfuck. 🙂

  11. Dealing and pimping? The bi-fecta of abject scum. Nice. At least when it all goes to hell and you’re facing a from-now-on sentence, some pimp firm that Czaban whores for can help. 🙂

  12. ha ha..
    jordana why you keep following czabe then if he’s such a whore.
    sound to me like you’re the whore,or your sister is.
    #pathetic

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